of the first annual Trillionaire Day™
WHEREAS on June 12, 2026, a private fortune reached thirteen digits for the first time in recorded history;
WHEREAS no act of congress, parliament, or god was required;
WHEREAS one man may now be worth a million millions, and the remaining eight billion persons may divide the difference;
WHEREAS such an achievement deserves an institution, and such an institution deserves a holiday;
NOW, THEREFORE, the Institute for Trillionaire Men™, by the authority vested in itself, does hereby proclaim June 12 of each year as TRILLIONAIRE DAY™, to be observed wherever holdings are counted.
The public is invited to mark the occasion at the commissary.
Given under the seal of the Institute, this twelfth day of June, in the year of our note two thousand twenty-six. IN EGO WE TRUST™.